I feel a bit bad I am writing about MIT because I don't want to make this blog solely talking about MIT. Sometimes I feel like writing college blog posts will further cultivate the toxic culture that plagues many students: the desire to go to a top college.
I put quotation marks around advice because I am not even a professional college counselor or teacher. I am simply an admitted student who is not even an adult. I am concerned that my ideas or thoughts might misguide students and enter the wrong path.
Without further ado, let's get started!
Cultural Background (Optional):
While the essay is optional, I strongly recommend that you attempt to write that short essay. I think it was easier for me to write that prompt because I lived in Taiwan as a preteen and that helped me understand my Chinese identity. In my essay, I mentioned my appreciation of Chinese culture and described the changes I experienced over time, specifically how I learned more about myself. By doing so, I demonstrated my growth and maturity. *
I improved the essay by providing a lot more imagery and sensory details about what it was like to experience Chinese culture in Taiwan. Before, I wrote about how I became more interested in learning Chinese, but this wasn't directly related to what I thought of culture such as food, traditions, beliefs, etc. This helped the readers visualize my experience. I provided concrete examples so it didn't feel so general because a substantial number of applicants are Chinese or Taiwanese American.
One weakness is that I talked a bit too much about my preteen years (9-13 years) in Taiwan, which isn't quite relevant to my high school years. However, those years were truly transformative.
Fun:
I sometimes wonder why MIT made the fun essay go from 100 words to 200-250 words. Maybe they enjoy reading these "what you do for fun" essays or they feel that 100 words are not enough to express one's love and passion for some hobby they do. I am glad I got the opportunity to write 250 words about what I enjoy doing.
Originally, I was lazy and decided to write about playing the piano. The problem with writing about piano was that I already mentioned in my non-scholastic honors that I won piano competitions, so that idea felt repetitive. I decided that the best topic to write about for this prompt was something that the readers could not find in any other part of my application like the activities section.
Then, I thought about what I do in my free time not because my parents made me do it or because it had some extrinsic award. Think about it. If you do the same thing regularly, there must be a reason you like doing it. I noticed that I enjoyed listening to This American Life quite often, I decided to write about that activity.
When I wrote this essay, I wanted my writing to somewhat persuade the readers why they should also consider doing that activity. I wanted the admissions officers' job to be easier by writing something that they would enjoy and laugh or smile at. Look, I am not telling you that you have to write like you are a comedian. In fact, I am not that funny. Being funny is simply one option you can consider if you are truly a humorous person.
The major edits I made to the essay were elaborating more upon why I found it amusing and funny to listen to This American Life (yes, some episodes are depressing but I focused on the humorous ones). Then, I cut down sentences in other parts like the conclusion.
Major:
Days before decision day, I decided the best way to tell myself I wasn't going to get in was by reading admitted essays. When I read them, I started doubting whether I even wrote the "why major" essay correctly. Now, I realized that there isn't one specific way to write this short prompt. Some do not mention much about the specific department at MIT, while others like me add some specific academic opportunities at MIT.
I started my essay by explaining why I loved the subject. Afterward, I mentioned why and how MIT will achieve my academic goals. By doing so, I demonstrated that I would make the best use of MIT's resources. I made sure to mention opportunities that were unique to MIT.
For the changes, I spent more time discussing why I enjoyed my field (~50 words) and then removed this specific class at MIT offered during IAP because it felt a bit odd and extra.
Contributed to Community:
This one required the biggest revision. My original one was about the reading program I did. After a family friend said that the idea wasn't good, I decided to use parts of my Common App. While I did help the children improve their reading, part of the reason they improved over time was that they learned more English at school. Therefore, I chose to write about the time management seminar because I think it is a safe assumption that fewer people write about that topic compared to a reading buddy program.
My main concern while writing the final draft was that I did not go straight to the point. To resolve this, I stated the problem right away and discussed how I attempted to solve the problem. I liked my hook that highlights people's addiction to technology because I think that this problem is very relatable and even the admissions officers might have trouble with productivity at times. The benefit of using my Common App for this prompt was that I got to improve my Common App essay (well I got rejected from Caltech so maybe it had no difference). I edited the body paragraph by emphasizing that I was not providing students with advice that they heard many times. Instead, I tried to provide some novel ideas for them.
In general, you do not have to write about common ideas like helping the homeless or building homes. Contributing to the community can be expressed in so many ways and it is not limited to charity.
World You Come From:
This prompt was the hardest for me. There was a short period where I felt like there was no light at the end of the tunnel because it appeared that I kept making the same mistakes over and over again. I would say I wrote 3-4 drafts before I finally found the right topic. Funny enough, it was answering Caltech's prompt about my community that helped me write the MIT essay.
Here are my failed ideas:
1. This American Life
2. Volunteer club
3. Moving
For idea one, I don't think it answered the prompt because the prompt is asking people this question: what external circumstances shaped the way you view the world? Others may disagree with me, but I feel that This American Life was not a physical world I embodied because it was audio. For idea two, I digressed and the idea wasn't good because I was only a member there for two years. For idea three, the tone was negative and it sounded like I was complaining about moving.
After brainstorming a while, I still wrote about moving but I portrayed it in a positive light. Yes, moving can be difficult but it also has its good sides. What helped me decide on what to write about was when my counselor asked me, "How do you contribute to your current community?" It took me a while before I could say something along the lines of interacting with both domestic and international students. I don't want to say that I am an exception at school, but the majority of students tend to cluster with their groups. By answering this question, I decided to write about how living in Taiwan and attending different schools made me interested to interact with various types of people instead of staying in my comfort zone.
I think the major reason I couldn't write a good essay, in the beginning, was that I limited the definition of community to obvious ones such as a group organization, town, family, etc. It was until a month before the deadline that I noticed that I still have some form of community even though I never lived in one place for most of my life.
In short, just think of how your dreams and aspirations will contribute to MIT's community. No, you don't need to explicitly state what you will do at MIT. Also, make sure that there is some actual proof that you took steps to achieve your dream and aspiration, or else it sounds vague.
Challenge:
Like the "how you have contributed to your community" prompt, I had to rewrite this. The good thing was that I knew this right around when school started. After letting a peer review my first draft (admitted MIT student), she said that writing about my challenges in an online chemistry class was not good. While I still believe that my first months in the online chemistry class were indeed difficult, the topic was quite predictable and did not sound that significant compared to other challenges. I decided to write about my Science Olympiad failure because the emotions I experienced at that time were still vivid and strong. The failure focused on how poorly my team did. You may ask, "Isn't competition failure common?" True, but I felt like it was better to present another side of me that demonstrated my leadership abilities and problem-solving skills instead of talking about my academic potential.
For this one, I had to explain why I considered this as a challenge and why I perceived it to be very upsetting. This tells the reader that there is some serious conflict that must be resolved or else they won't understand why I thought it was important to me. Before I didn't convey why I was so disappointed and upset so this caused peer reviewers to not get the gravity of the situation. Ok, I am not telling you to exaggerate the event because that will show you are too critical of yourself. For a group organization like Science Olympiad, I avoided blaming others even though I did not hold 100% responsibility for the failure.
The main elements of this essay are that you should show that you attempted to solve the problem. Then, you should mention the tangible impact that is evidence.
I decided to end the essay by viewing this challenge more positively despite the fact the situation was not ideal. While writing, I thought of what would happen if this obstacle did not happen.
Epilogue:
I said in my previous blog that I started in July, but I technically started formulating ideas in the spring semester of junior year by applying to SSP (Summer Science Program). Some of the prompts were the same as MIT's. This included the "what you do for fun," "the world you come from," and "challenge." Although I got waitlisted by SSP, I am glad I applied to the program because applying to SSP was like preliminary essay practice for a school like MIT. Looking back, I believe that the reason I did not get into SSP was that my essays were not good.
Also, I recommend that you guys apply to science summer programs during my junior year because a lot of the prompts ask you why you are interested in this field and why you want to attend the program. I am fortunate to write some decent ones for other programs like COSMOS and BU RISE because they saved me some time for "why major" essays. These "why major" essays are not only found in MIT's prompts but also the UC prompts and other safety schools.
*If you are confused about the difference between Taiwan and China, Taiwan mainly consists of ethnic Chinese that are originally from China like Fujian province. Some aspects of culture in Taiwan are distinct from the culture in China, but there are some overlaps.
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